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How to know if you really love yourself?

Updated: Jun 27, 2022

Self-love is often lauded but hard to achieve. However, when you learn how to love and cherish yourself, your life can transform in unique ways beyond your imagination.

Here are five solid things to let you know you are there and have valued love for yourself.

#1: Stop worrying about others’ opinions

It is no longer a concern for you to appeal to everyone or please everyone. When you learn to love and accept yourself the way you are, you stop giving attention to how others view you. You know that you are out there for yourself and not to impress anyone else.

"Would you rather be at war with yourself and at peace with the world, or at peace with yourself and at war with the world?" - Nipsey Hussle

#2: Recognize you don’t need a partner to make you happy

When you start validating your existence instead of waiting for a significant other to validate it. When all the sympathetic gazes, the condescending pat on the shoulder, or the famous “you’ll find someone” doesn't annoy you anymore, you will know you have healed. In fact, it makes you appreciate what you currently have and enjoy flying solo even more.

#3: Begin to be comfortable with your body

When you can look at your body in the mirror and start admiring and accepting its beauty and flaws. You will find yourself owning and loving everything in you and feeling comfortable in your own skin to the extent that the pressure social media places on you no longer impact your self-esteem. You will finally perceive yourself as a beautiful human that doesn’t have to fit in a specific mold to appeal to the rest, you celebrate and cherish yourself regardless.


#4: Start valuing spending time alone

Spending time with yourself doesn’t mean you don't enjoy other people’s companionship anymore. It means you are balanced enough to require some “me time” every now and then and enjoy it. Loving yourself means loving time alone with yourself. It is very refreshing, profoundly liberating, and an excellent opportunity to reconnect with yourself.

#5: Surround yourself with positive people

Eliminating negative people from your life can be a starting point to loving yourself. When you surround yourself with the wrong people, they can knock your confidence and down your self-esteem. But, when you invite the right like-minded people into your life, you start feeling a lot better and getting the support you always wished to have. Loving yourself gives you the courage to find the right circle because you deserve to be surrounded by good, positive friends.


- Regard Tang


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