How to stop struggling and accepting yourself?
Updated: Jun 13, 2022
No matter which way you turn, there’s always going to be an image you struggle with. You’ll be scrolling on your socials and see healthy and fit people; you’ll walk outside and see a group of people having the time of their lives or you’ll be at work and see someone exceed you in all areas. There will always be an outside source that challenges your inner world, which might make you feel insecure.
Here’s how to keep that pillar intact while you’re faced with those messages:
Live in the Present
This seems irrelevant but walk with me here. We often find ourselves saying “when I lose weight then I’ll wear that dress” or “I had prettier hair all those years ago.” But the thing is, we can’t go back and change things and we can’t focus on the future so much that it detracts from what’s going on. You can only change your right now. You want to lose weight? Choose healthier food options or take a walk. Don’t worry about how you’re going to maintain this burst of energy tomorrow because that’s in the future.
Communicate Clear Boundaries
When you respect yourself, it’s obvious because you let people know their place and space in your life. Though self-respect could take more time than you imagine, the best way to practice is to make sure people understand that you won’t be walked all over. It can be scary to suddenly set boundaries if you had none and the people, you’re asking to respect the boundaries may find themselves offended but here’s the thing: boundaries being set mean that you want this person to stay in your life, they just need to respect you.
“Deciding what not to do is as important as deciding what to do.” - Steve Jobs
Know that you’re Enough
You’re you, no one else can take that away. There may be things you don’t care for but in that same breath, there has to be something you like? Maybe you don’t like to switch up the music you listen to but you’re incredibly kind? Maybe you aren’t as spontaneous as others but you’re always there when someone needs you. Though there are things that you can work towards being, you’re overall always going to be yourself. As the serenity prayer goes: “grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
Life has its ups and its down, there are times we’re completely enthralled with ourselves and times we may not be happy with what we’re working with but at the end of the day, you’re you. You have to live with yourself for the rest of your life so you might as well love it all.
- Regard Tang